Feeling lost

I'm feeling a little bit lost right now, sort of like I'm in no-man's-land. This morning I was in Dorset, now I'm in Yorkshire, and for an hour this morning I was in my flat in London.

Tomorrow afternoon I head back to London with more things - mainly my writing drafts, laptop and odds and ends - but part of me feels like I don't want to go. It's silly. I know I'll be fine when I get there, unpack, and make my room mine, but there is a small part of me that believes I could quite happily stay here.

But, I experienced the same thing when I first moved to Scotland for university - I really didn't want to go. There were tears, there were tantrums, but flash forward to six weeks before my first year had even finished and I was crying my eyes out at the thought of having to leave for the summer!

And, the thing is, this is completely different. I moved to St Andrews knowing no one; I'm moving to London where my boyfriend, best friend and lots of my friends live. I'm a lot more older and wiser than I was at 18 (supposingly) - am I wrong to feel apprehensive and a little lost? Probably, but right now that's how I feel. Roll on next weekend when I'm settled in and have survived my first week in my new job - I'm sure I'll scoff at these worries this time next week, I hope so anyway! xoxo


  1. I think you have every right to feel a little lost - London is crazy - even when I tried to walk slowly through Kings Cross I got swept along with the people and still walked fast.

    I'm sure all your friends will take care of you :) and who knows i might get to come and meet you in the near future :D

  2. You'll be fine once you're there but the in-between shuttling back and forwards bit is always going to be hard. Get something lovely arranged for your first proper weekend there and you'll forget to be sad x

  3. It's totally natural to feel nervous and change, and London is a scary place in some ways. I've only been in my flat in London for a week now and spent most of that week fleeing back home to my family home in Cambridge.

    Once you've settled in properly, been working normally for a few weeks, etc. it'll all be good.

    We should go for coffee some time as well now that you live in London.

  4. All perfectly normal IMO. Moving is the most stressful thing you can do, and you've got to that there London.

    In all honesty I think you should be damn proud of yourself.